Christmas In the Draper House

It was a busy Christmas this year in our house! We had Dan's parents and oldest brother and sister-in-law, along with our cutie-patootie niece, Bryn, stay with us all the way from Charleston, S.C. We also had his other brother and his girlfriend, and my parents and sister, and some friends, popping in and out throughout the week. Needless to say I had little no time to update recently.

Things have calmed down around the house now, and we're slowly putting away the holiday decor and getting back to the daily grind. Today was my first day back at work in a week and a half...and boy was it S-L-O-W. Everyone else must have taken lots of time off too, because I only had three e-mails upon return.

As tonight is New Year's Eve, I'm busy making a resolutions list, most of which I'm sure to disregard within a month. "Develop a stronger sense of patience" is at the top of that list. As January rolls in, I am reminded that it's approaching the 30 day mark for the wait for our license...but, I suspect that if I can take a week and a half off during the holidays, so can the license approval people. Which means that our license will probably come later than I had hoped. Just means a few more days of sleep, right?

Looking forward to celebrating tonight, in my sparkly purple dress and heels, and looking forward to all that 2013 has to offer!

-Jenn

Room for One More

I've been promising this post! I finally got pictures of the nursery taken, now that it's just about finished. It's a little bland right now, but I'm sure it will be filled with character very shortly!

Caution: Night time, cell phone photos ahead!

It's a small room. Let's be honest...this is almost the whole thing.

The steal-of-a-deal crib (that Mom almost had a brawl over) and the mobile from our Jaycees Baby Shower!

Remember this post? I got the nursery set!

Babies need toys and books!

We have some great people with mad skills in my life!
Our friend Tiff made the first blanket, and  my Grandma made the next three.

Drawers stuffed with clothes of all different sizes, for both sexes!

I made the valance, and the jungle animals are stickers.

It looks like there is a perfect space for a name here!

I picked this up years ago from a cool, local artist and I have been saving it for a nursery ever since.

And there you have it, folks. It's almost done...just needs a kiddo! We should hear soon that our paperwork is turned into the state, and from there it's a 30-60 day wait for our license, and then anxiously checking our phones!

Promises, Promises

I've promised myself (and, more importantly, my hubby) that I will not buy any more clothes until we have a placement. We have plenty of things to get us through a day or two of either sex, from preemie to 18 months. I really don't need to buy any more clothes. But seriously...how cute are these?

Truths About Prepping for Foster Care/Adoption

We had our final home visit on Monday night, and things went really well. Our licensing worker has been really great, and we're a little disappointed that we're finished with her! From now on we will work with other staff at Iowa KidsNet to handle placements and relicensing process (next year). Abby, our licensing worker, had all of our paperwork, and had been able to write up most of our home study (that's the official report that goes to the the state). She just needed clarification on a few points, and some more phone numbers for references (so if we gave her yours, be nice!) So the rest of this approval process is now in the hands of the wonderful people at Iowa KidsNet and DHS. We have done everything we could to make it go quickly, and now we wait.

Not having tasks to focus on makes my mind wander, and I thought I would address some of these wandering thoughts with a post.

Truth #1: I still wonder "What if this doesn't work?" How long, and how often, will Dan and I be able to do this process without finding our baby? We know that it may not (probably won't) be the first baby who stays with us. But how many placements will come and go before we can't handle it any more? Logically, I know that there really isn't an answer to this right now. The answer to this will come when, and if, that situation occurs. This process, like any other, is one that we have to experience, not plan. Hard to remember when you'd really like to plan for holidays next year, or a summer vacation, or family pictures.

Truth #2: I'm still a little jealous. I still have lots of friends having babies. And I still get a twinge of jealousy in knowing that their path is permanent. I still feel sad that I may not be able to offer my stories of labor and delivery when the girls in the office start talking about it. I may not know what the first 6 months, or 8 months, or 10, are like with a baby. But I am reminded, when someone I know is looking down a similar path that Dan and I are traveling asks me about the process, that I have my own stories to share, and my own advice to offer. A difficult truth for a traditionalist like me, but a truth none the less.

Truth #3: I trust God a little more today than yesterday. Because we are never given a path that we aren't able to walk. And families come in all shapes and sizes. And because I haven't been let down yet.



Happy Friday, ya'll!

-Jenn

Catching Up

Woah! Time flies when you're having fun, huh? It's been a while since my last post...October has been crazy!

We finished our PS-MAPP classes a few weeks ago, and turned in a TON of homework, including a our books that had to be completed because we were missing our last class. It feels like time flew by, even though the classes were sometimes a little boring to sit through.

We also managed to get most of the important stuff up in the nursery- the crib has a mattress, there's a nice chair, and the dresser (ugh...the dresser...more on that at another time). Just need to hang some stuff up and throw some splashes of color in, and it should be all ready for the first kiddo to grace it. I'll post pictures sometime this week, when I'm finished with it.

We're looking forward to our final homestudy on November 5th. We'll basically spend time going through everything we talked about at the previous two, but it will be written down this time, and we'll sign off on it. She will also be checking out our place to make sure it's finally ready for placement (we shouldn't have any issues), and answer any final questions we have. From there, the supervisor at the agency will review it and submit it to DHS by December 3rd, and DHS takes 30-60 days to approve and send us our license. We are anticipating sometime after the first of the year to start getting calls, but because the holidays are such a stressful time, there is a small chance that they will make things quicker and we could be placed around Christmas. We're not holding our breath for that date, though.

I have to be honest, now that we are done with everything, I have these moments where I stop and think "WHAT are we doing? This is crazy! What if we're not ready for this?" But I'm comforted with reminders that all new parents feel that way at some point. So then I take a deep breath, and continue the journey one step at a time. It's all we can do!

On a final note: I recognize that this blog is seriously lacking in pictures. I promise I'll make that up sometime soon! But for now, check out this cute "Parents to Be" photo shoot by a couple fostering-to-adopt! How great is that?!

Until next time, friends!

-J

PS-MAPP Class 1-6 Overview

So, I realized I haven't updated you all on our classes recently! We have four (well, technically five but we're missing the last class) more before we're done!

Class 1: Introductions and the basics of foster care/adoption/respite (temporary fostering) care

Class 2: Cycle of need (how it differs in children in foster care), steps in a foster care case (how a family becomes a client, a very abridged version of how eventual adoption/reunification happens), and stages of development in children and recognizing what's 'abnormal' about a child's development.

Class 3: The need to be a 'loss expert' and how many different forms there are of loss. We talked about the normal stages of grief, how important it is to support children during times of loss (and tips on how to do that), and we discussed the importance of partnership.

Class 4: Helping children with attachments. We discussed Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, how important attachment is and how many children in foster care have difficulties attaching or developing meaningful attachments and suggestions on how to build those attachments with a variety of children.

Class 5: Behavior management. We talked about the differences between punishment (something you do to stop a behavior) versus discipline (something you do to change or encourage a specific behavior). In most cases, discipline is preferred over punishment. We talked about a variety of techniques to discipline children, and that physical punishment is not allowed in the foster care system. We learned some of the ways case workers identify children who need to be removed from their birth parents (a safety concern versus a risk).

Class 6: The importance of keeping a child connected to their birth families, or in absence of that, their cultural roots and heritage. We talked about different activities we could do, places we could go (locally) to maintain attachment, etc. Dan and I both felt like this was the most valuable class so far, because we really started talking about the foster care and adoption process in depth (timing of things, your rights as a foster/adoptive parent, etc).

We have a set of case studies that we use every class to reiterate the information we have learned, and give us some 'real-world application'. They are real cases of children (different ages, backgrounds, etc.) who were placed in the foster care system for a variety of reasons, and we use them to identify some of the things we feel we absolutely could not handle.

Overall, the classes have been long and sometimes tedious, but I think they are a really useful tool in helping you make sure this decision is in your family's best interest. We have had some questions come up that we hadn't thought of, and we've gotten a lot of answers to questions that  you just can't find on the internet. We're anxious to have Thursday nights back, though!

Technically, we have four classes left, but Dan and I will only be attending the next three. We'll be off on family vacation for the last one!

I Still Don't Care About Your Constipation

About a year ago, I made a post on Facebook that was fairly controversial among my friends:

11/16/11 "Among the list of things I hate: listening to people constantly complain about their pregnancy. Sit down, shut up and count your blessings. I'd gladly take your place. I'm sure it's not all roses, but it certainly has to be worth it in the end."

I made the post in reference to a few select girls who posted, quite literally, on a daily basis about what was wrong with their pregnancy. Acid reflux, constipation, dry skin, stretch marks...Frankly, all things that, even as a woman who's never been pregnant, I can safely say I understand are part of pregnancy.

Many of my friends misinterpreted this post, and got very defensive about it (either on the thread or in private messages). They thought that I was saying Facebook should not be used to talk about your baby, and insisted that I was just jealous because I wasn't pregnant. Truth be told, I was jealous, but even if I had not been, and had gotten pregnant, Facebook is not the place to complain about how awful you feel every day.

As an "expectant mother" myself now, I can truly say that I am no longer jealous of pregnant chicks. I have found my path to motherhood, and gratefully get to miss acid reflux/stretch marks/dry skin/constipation/throwing up etc. But...

I still don't want to hear your dirty details every day.

If you need a suggestion about how to handle your situation (example: gosh, I can't eat anything without getting heartburn! What worked for you?) that's fine. If you plan to regale us with the latest trip to the bathroom (5 times a day) and all that ensued, or complain (once again) about how tired you are and how nothing got done today, I beg you to reconsider. No matter how much your friends love you, it really gets annoying.

Rant over!
-Jenn

We're Expecting!

Don't get too excited, the plan hasn't changed!

Yesterday, while I was in another office for work, one of my supervisors asked me if it was "public knowledge that I was an expecting mother?" I quickly corrected her, reminding her that I was just fostering and adopting, not having a baby. And her response? "Don't be silly, of course you are expecting! Are you not expecting to have a baby in your house soon?" And the answer, of course, is yes.

I am so lucky to have supportive people all over in my life, who are helping us get through this process. This particular woman has been a mentor and a guide through the infertility questions, and now is a huge supporter and a great role model for successful adoption. She has already given me some great ideas about getting through the process, building attachment and bonding with my child, and I know there's so much more to come! I'm so glad to have her on my team! :)

PS-MAPP 2 class was last week. In this class, we discussed the importance of communication and of having a relationship with the birth parents. I'm sure this is something that is much easier said than done, as every situation is different, and every parent is different, but the idea seems pretty logical.

We also spent a good amount of time discussing the types of children we will see come through foster care- different disabilities, different life experiences (sexual abuse, drug exposure, etc.) This topic seemed to be the most useful. Dan and I really started to get a handle on what we could accept and what we would have to decline, and if we accepted certain cases, what we could expect to come along with those.

Our first home study is scheduled for September 18th! We, of course, are still working on all of the associated paperwork. The cats go to the vet for vaccines on Friday, this weekend I must clean out my closets and organize my file drawers, because I seem to have misplaced my marriage license (which they also need a copy of). And there is the small matter of a crib and chair that need to be moved out of the living room and into the (non-existent) nursery...so much to do, so little time!

PS-MAPP Session 1

Dan and I just got back from a weekend in Chicago with his mom and dad, and it was awesome! Very fun and very relaxing. I rode a train for the first time since I was three...turns out, the commuter train is nothing special. We got into town Friday evening around 8, and did dinner and hotel pool time that night. Saturday we visited the Field Museum and wandered around downtown (I love big cities! Dan, on the other hand, does not). Sunday was spent at IKEA and the Cheesecake Factory (Dan's one request for the trip). We came home with a new desk, new dishes, lots of little odds and ends, and a long to-do list!

Our PS-MAPP class started last Thursday. It was a pretty typical, FULL, first session class, lots of introductions and time for questions. The class is always taught by an employee of the agency that handles the paperwork in our state (a local non-profit) and a current, experienced foster parent. We found out that our foster parent leader has eight children (whhaaa??) and six of them have been or are in the process of being adopted from the foster care system. During introductions, we found out that some people had waited since last March to get into this class! I don't know their full story, but hearing that made me wonder how we got in so quickly...but I'm trusting there was a reason.

We talked a little about the kinds of children we could expect to see in foster care, and a little about relationships with birth parents. We did read a case study to introduce the kinds of supports that would be needed from foster parents in the reunification process, the kinds of things the state could require birth parents to do in order to regain custody, and we discussed how we would handle the situation personally. 

We ended up not getting through everything, so on top of the huge stack of paperwork we already had for homework, we were also directed to finish all the reading for Session 1. I can't believe how much paper this class requires! I swear we received an entire tree's worth in the first session. Homework this week consisted of our Parent Profile (how we were raised, what we believe, how we celebrate and mourn in our family, family traditions, relationships within the family, and 14 more pages) and our Couple Profile (how we interact as a couple, how that will change with a child, etc) and also our Home Study packet (all the necessary forms and agreements required by the state to foster). The Home Study packet and the profiles will be submitted at the end of our 10 week class along with the results and notes from our PS-MAPP instructors and the licensing staff who studies our house.

So, while we complete all the paperwork, we will work simultaneously to get our house ready. Our home study and all the paperwork must be submitted within 110 days of beginning class...so let the fun begin!

Moving Forward

Well...we were approved! It's been a little bit of a roller coaster ever since, and things are starting to move quickly.

Friday afternoon we received a call that we were approved to begin our PS-MAPP classes...but that the next open class starting in our area would be in January! What a bummer! But wait...they were going to check into some things and give me a call back before the end of the day on Friday.

Friday...no call. Guess we'll have to wait until January. But that's ok, because it gives us more time to get the house ready, and pick up everything we need, and get organized. In fact, Friday evening, Mom and I did some shopping at Babies R Us. That's right. Real baby shopping. We picked up a baby monitor that was a crazy good deal, and took a gander at all things baby-related.

Over the weekend, Dan shared the news with his family and we're feeling very supported and even more exited to start this process. It's definitely a different way of building a family, and there will be lots of storms to weather, questions to ask, and confusion...but we're feeling pretty confident that in the end, it will all come together.

Monday rolls around, and I get a call from Iowa KidsNet...to tell me they have room in their Iowa City class, starting this week! So starting Thursday, we'll begin 10 weeks of classes, as well as finally getting everything organized upstairs, picking up some necessary supplies, and decorating the kiddo's room!

On the subject of decorating- we got a crib! Another great deal, this time at Target, and it's a great compromise between Dan and my decorating styles. It's a cherry crib by Sorelle, and we've started to finally get a vision of how this room should look.

Things are coming together, and we couldn't be more excited!

Commitment Issues

I sit here, staring at a screen whose title reads 'Place Your Order'. And something is stopping me from pressing the button. It's not the cost, or that I'm unsure if it's the right item.

It's a book my sister-in-law recommends highly: "Baby Bargains" (the 9th edition). She used it all the time while shopping for baby stuff for my beautiful niece, and it would definitely answer the questions I'm having (like, is it worth paying $300 for a carseat, or is the $150 one just as safe?) But I'm hesitant to purchase it, because we still haven't heard from the state.

And that's not unusual. It hasn't even been 3 weeks since we submitted the last paperwork. They told us a month from the day we submitted everything. And if I know the state (and I do...I work with them everyday), we'll probably be lucky if it is within that month window, and not a day or two later.

I just want an answer. I want DHS to conclude what I already know- that my husband, though he's made mistakes, will be an amazing father. And that placing a child (or a few) in our care will be one of the best decisions made for that child. I want to be able to buy "Baby Bargains" and go clothes shopping on Tax Free Holiday. But I'm having commitment issues. I don't want to purchase another item that, if we aren't approved, will be another reminder that we are stuck.

Logically, I think what you all are probably thinking. "It's just a few more weeks. It's not that long. Just wait, you'll have plenty of time to buy all the stuff you want and need." But it's a rough wait. It's hard to have such an important part of your future in another person's hands.

But for tonight, I'll close the window. I can always order it tomorrow. Tonight, I'll go to bed (and hope to fall asleep despite Dan's loud snoring) and maybe tomorrow I'll get that call from the state. :)

No Use Crying Over Spilled Paint

Picking a paint color for the bedroom we'll use as a nursery has become such a daunting task. I can't have pink (what if it's a boy?), no blue (already have a blue room, and what if it's a girl?), can't have yellow (Dan doesn't like it). Tan would work, but not too dark (it's a small room), and not too light (or we might as well leave it white), and do we want yellow or red undertones, or maybe blue? What about grey instead of tan? Can a baby's room be the same color as my master and hallway?

I took my mom with me this time (trip #4 to the hardware store), because if anyone's going to be able to find the right color, she will. The result of this trip was one frustrated foster-momma-to-be, crying in the middle of the paint section because "this is not how I expected to pick my nursery colors!" Another realization that this journey is not typical, and not always easy.

My mom asked why I was crying, if I really felt like this was the right choice. The only answer to that question is that, despite feeling really good about this decision, there are things I have to let go of. The idea of a baby shower, and of knowing the sex of my child (what did people do before Week 20 Ultrasounds!?) and so many other things. There is an adjustment to the idea that multiple babies may live in this room before our baby makes it a home. How do you create a space for multiple children when each child is unique and special?

The answer (which came to me with my 6:45 am reminder from the cats for their breakfast) is that this space is just that. A space. And each child who graces it with their presence will make it their own. And it will be filled with love, from Day One. And someday, our child will be in that room. And he or she won't care about the color of the walls or the pattern on their crib sheets (at least not right away). He or she will care that we gave them a safe place to call home, and a family who cares for them, and soft place to land when their world is upside down. Because that's what moms and dads do.

And they help you pick out the perfect color of paint (a process I have put on hold for this week).

My Little (Not-So) Secret

I'll go ahead and admit something to you, and it might surprise you:

I'm not all that broken up about not being pregnant.

There you go. I said it. The truth is, I'm not.

I spent a lot of months crying when I got my period. I thought that what I was experiencing was feeling like a failure because I couldn't get something as simple as creating life right. Twelve year olds can do it, for Christ-sake! Crying because I wasn't pregnant, and this was how Dan and I had decided to create a family. I (mistakenly) put a lot of pressure on getting pregnant, because I thought that adoption was an absolute last resort for my husband. Let's back up:

Before I met my husband, and we decided we were going to spend the rest of our lives together, I always thought I would adopt. My picture-perfect family included a perfect little Haitian or African bundle of love (why those races? I have no idea. It was just what I pictured.) Then I met Dan, and we talked about all the things people talk about (or should talk about) before they get married, and it was pretty clear that his preferred way of creating a family was for me to be pregnant. So, whatever, no big deal, the time came to start our family and I thought, as many people do, 'Well, I'll just get pregnant!'

If only it were as easy as 'just getting pregnant.' I gave it a few months of try-and-see-what-happens sex, and then I moved on to temping, and then ovulation prediction kits, and then green teas, Vitex, vitamins...all the home remedies for trouble conceiving. And then we decided to see the RE, did a few tests that gave us an indication of the problem, and we were told to keep it up and come back and see her after we had tried for a year (yeah, I know, I pushed that visit). And then we got the bill, and decided we would just continue trying for a while. And now we sit at almost two years of unsuccessful attempts (and one big disappointing missed period). We sit at the doorstep of fostering-to-adopt, a decision that, while not entered into lightly, is fully supported by my husband and really didn't take as much convincing as I thought.

For some people, BEING pregnant is half the journey and one of the most amazing parts of building a family. For me, it's a means to an end. I'm sure it's an experience unlike any other, and if I were to conceive I would embrace it wholeheartedly. But if I never conceive, and end up with a wonderful adopted child (even if they aren't Haitian or African) and a full family, I'm pretty sure I won't miss being pregnant.


That's my secret, let's keep it between us ;)

Indulging (just a little bit)

Last week, I let myself indulge again in the idea of decorating a nursery. I even convinced Dan to take a quick tour through the baby section at Target. We looked at cribs, and playpens, and bedding, and baskets, and paint colors...and all the other little things that remind me of what's (hopefully) at the end of this road.

We talked about how to arrange the room so it would be easy to make into a nursery with a day or two of notice, but wouldn't have to sit there as a constant reminder of what we don't have. This is such a strange journey we've chosen (or that's chosen us?) and sometimes it's hard to imagine how a family, MY family, will come from such a strange path. But it will. And I have to remember that.

And every once in a while, I have to indulge...just a little bit...to remind myself that our baby is still out there. And will be home soon. Exactly when it's supposed to happen.

Hurry Up and Wait

Well, we're in the "hurry-up-and-wait" phase of this process. On June 14th, we attended our informational session. It was a good experience overall, but left us with more questions than answers. Most of those questions are not things we'll be able to answer until we're working directly with a social worker through the process, so for now we have decided to continue until we feel we shouldn't anymore.

The informational session was about an hour and a half presentation with time to answer questions. Many people in the room were there because they already have a child in their home, or know of a child who needs a foster parent, and they want to be that person. A few of us were there because we wanted to take youth who needed a place to stay. The questions were different based on each situation, but ultimately we came away with the feelings that:

1) Foster parents are needed in our state, and specifically our county.

2) Fostering can be a difficult journey (no big surprise), and the youth who are in the program can be very damaged.

3) It's unlikely that the first placement we get will be our 'forever' baby.

4) We are going to have to be VERY picky, for our sake and the child's sake, with who comes in to our home.

After the presentation, it was time to submit our paperwork. We were fingerprinted- proudly, I can say that was my first time. My husband, unfortunately, can't say the same thing. Once fingerprinting was over, we met with one of the volunteers, who looked over our paperwork, put everything together and took it from us.

We knew that we would have an extra step, in comparison to some applicants. Since Dan had been arrested in college, we knew we would have to answer some extra questions. So on July 2nd, we received a packet with paperwork for Dan to fill out based on the 'who/what/why' of his arrests, and a chance to explain what he had learned and why he should still be approved as a foster parent. He filled those out and attached some documents to help explain things, and that was all submitted yesterday (July 12).

So now we wait (again). A panel convenes monthly to go over all of the situations similar to ours, and determine who is still eligible to foster/adopt. While this isn't the most difficult part of the foster-to-adopt journey, it is the first 'make-or-break' point we have reached. If they say no, this leg of our family-building journey is over. If they say yes, it's only just begun! We should hear within 30 days, and if we are approved, it's on to PS-MAPP classes (10 weeks of classes to prepare us for The System).

We'll keep you updated!

-Jenn

Choices

We began our journey to build a family in September of 2010. We won't bore you with the details, but after about 7-8 months of trying, we decided to have a consultation with the reproductive endocrinologist (infertility specialist). We had some preliminary tests done, and the results gave us an idea of what the issue was. Unfortunately, we have no insurance coverage for infertility issues (which is not uncommon) and even the basic testing and treatments were not in our budget. After several more months of trying unsuccessfully, we came to a point where decisions needed to be made on how to move forward in this journey.


We looked at the facts:
Medical Treatments: financially, we weren't equipped to pay for fertility treatments- $300 doctor visits, $100 blood draws, drugs ranging from $10-$250 or more, potentially $3000+ procedures...it all added up to something we weren't prepared to spend for the mere possibility of getting pregnant.


Private adoption, both domestic and international, were not in the cards for us at this time. International carries a lot of risk, is also harder to qualify for in a lot of ways, and is as expensive (if not more) than the medical treatments. Domestic is another option, but also carries a pretty price tag, and many of the adoption agencies locally won't consider you unless you've been married for 3+ years, and the waiting lists are long.


That left us with foster-to-adopt. An option that we, at first, were not open to. We knew that it would be very difficult for us to welcome a child into our home only to say goodbye a short time later. We thought it would be a revolving door of children before we found one that we could call our own. We also had concerns about the background of the children in the program and whether we were capable of handling the extra needs foster children can have.


After doing some research, along with personal talks with other families in similar situations, we found that fostering-to-adopt had a lot of myths around it. We also discovered that we had a say in who came into our lives, and that it's possible to only accept children who's parents have very little chance of regaining custody.


We had a couple of sit-down sessions with each other, talking about the process, the kinds of children we would be able to accept in our lives, what challenges we could face along the way...in another post we'll share the questions and concerns we discussed before beginning this process.


Ultimately, however, we decided to jump in, and on May 30, 2012 we submitted our initial inquiry form to begin the process. Our next step will be attending an informational session on June 14th, where we will fill out paperwork and get a few more questions answered.


We're looking forward to moving things along! Stay tuned for more!

Introductions

Hello and thanks for visiting!


We started this blog for a few reasons:
1) It's hard to find a detailed version of events when it comes to foster to adopt, particularly state-specific. We want to share our experience with other hopeful parents, and give a clear idea of what kind of ride you get on when you begin this process.
2) We want to chronicle the development of our family, even if it's a non-traditional process. Other families have blogs filled with ultrasound pictures and explanations of all the good and bad things that come along with pregnancy and birth. Even though our experience will be a little different, we still want to have something to look back on.


So, in order to give you an idea of how and why we are writing this blog, we'll give you a little background on our situation.


Dan is 27, has a degree is sociology and ethics, and manages a restaurant.


Jenn is 26, has a degree in psychology and non-profit management, and works as a grant coordinator (dealing with underage and binge drinking) in a nearby county.


We were married in June of 2010, after dating for 5 years. In May of 2011 we purchased our first house- a brand new, adorable 3-bedroom in a very up-and coming neighborhood of the second largest city in Iowa.


We have chosen to begin the process of fostering-to-adopt after many discussions and lots of time spent doing research and debating the pros and cons of all of our choices. In a later post, we'll talk a little about what brought us to this decision, and some of the things we had to consider before throwing our hat in the ring.


We hope this blog is a resource for other parents-to-be when they consider their options. We hope you get to know us, and get to experience this ride with us!
-Jenn and Dan